You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
bring money and cleavage
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
