how can u be prego again
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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