Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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