morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
