okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize