NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize