What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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