I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize