I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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