last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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