Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize