After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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