How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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