She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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