Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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