I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
