this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Im just a social blackout drinker.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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