so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
