Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize