I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
