if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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