i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
