if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
