It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize