Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
