There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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