I'm lost and stupid without you.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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