i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
