are you still at the devil's house?
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
This is my life. Enjoy the view
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
