I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Sext me about skeletons
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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