he shaved USA in his pubs
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize