so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He felt like a one man threesome
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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