Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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