When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
