I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize