Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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