Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize