your parents love me but you hate me
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
