So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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