from now on my penis is your penis
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
