she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize