i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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