Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize