yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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