She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize
