Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Randomize