they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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