dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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