you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Duck Duck Cougar?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
