Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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